How did you know it was time?

Sheltie - no help. The sheltie I had when I was young had bladder cancer and I feel my parents couldn't say goodbye to her. I feel we followed their steps many, many years later. We had a dachshund, Buddy, that I can share with you about. He was 14 when we made a decision for him. Our vet, without going into costly exams and testing, felt that his issues were neurological. His health, the way he deteriorated, her experience, all led her to that thought. He declined in health after 10 but his back issues had been sort of a big deal a few times when he was younger. From 10 - 12, he deteriorated at a slow rate of speed, but we still felt his quality of life exceeded the time his issues were a problem. From 12 - 14, they excelled and his 'quality of life' deteriorated rapidly. He went from an active dog, to one who couldn't see well, hear well, was incontinent and wore a diaper. Our vet comes to our house, so she sees our pets in their 'normal' state. In his last 2 years, we had her out here pretty much every 4 - 6 months. When we felt we had done everything we could for him, without putting him through the discomfort of testing and time away from family and pet family which would have stressed him. we started questioning ourselves. Our kids actually felt we let him go too long - the last year he was with us, they felt we were selfish. We made 'the call' 3 times with our vet and backed out the first two once she was here. When we look back, yes, he lived a very, very, very undignified life the last few years, totally not himself, not the life he loved. It is a HARD call that only you can make. Looking back, I do often wish we had made the call about a year earlier. I sort of feel now that we owed him dignity after all he gave to our family and that last year we did deny him a crapload of dignity.

Sometimes our pets hold on to life for us. I believe Buddy did this for our family. Sometimes, pets can go on their own, but often now, with all we have available to us, we have them hang on longer.

Only you can decide because only you know your pupper. It sucks either way. Sorry, and I wish you peace with your decision whenever you are ready to make it.
 
Sandy in CT said:
Sheltie - no help. The sheltie I had when I was young had bladder cancer and I feel my parents couldn't say goodbye to her. I feel we followed their steps many, many years later. We had a dachshund, Buddy, that I can share with you about. He was 14 when we made a decision for him. Our vet, without going into costly exams and testing, felt that his issues were neurological. His health, the way he deteriorated, her experience, all led her to that thought. He declined in health after 10 but his back issues had been sort of a big deal a few times when he was younger. From 10 - 12, he deteriorated at a slow rate of speed, but we still felt his quality of life exceeded the time his issues were a problem. From 12 - 14, they excelled and his 'quality of life' deteriorated rapidly. He went from an active dog, to one who couldn't see well, hear well, was incontinent and wore a diaper. Our vet comes to our house, so she sees our pets in their 'normal' state. In his last 2 years, we had her out here pretty much every 4 - 6 months. When we felt we had done everything we could for him, without putting him through the discomfort of testing and time away from family and pet family which would have stressed him. we started questioning ourselves. Our kids actually felt we let him go too long - the last year he was with us, they felt we were selfish. We made 'the call' 3 times with our vet and backed out the first two once she was here. When we look back, yes, he lived a very, very, very undignified life the last few years, totally not himself, not the life he loved. It is a HARD call that only you can make. Looking back, I do often wish we had made the call about a year earlier. I sort of feel now that we owed him dignity after all he gave to our family and that last year we did deny him a crapload of dignity.

Sometimes our pets hold on to life for us. I believe Buddy did this for our family. Sometimes, pets can go on their own, but often now, with all we have available to us, we have them hang on longer.

Only you can decide because only you know your pupper. It sucks either way. Sorry, and I wish you peace with your decision whenever you are ready to make it.
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Thank you for sharing this.
 
My Barkley had dementia. We let him go just a few months ago, at age 12. Barkley had Lyme disease as a puppy and relapses all his life, which aged him far too quickly. He had arthritis issues, caused by the Lyme, and about a year ago began having issues with dementia. He would get stuck in places in the house he knew, seem confused, refuse foods he'd preciously eaten. I struggled getting him to eat for the last 8 months. Finally, one afternoon he had a seizure and that was my sign that he had had enough. His poor body was a shell he was existing in, and not happily. Still, letting him go the next day was as hard as it always is.

I've had to make this decision with other Shelties so I am not a stranger to it, but you're never really sure it's time. I've second-guessed myself many times after the fact. The best advice I've ever gotten on this subject came from someone who has had Shelties all her life and is very wise. She said it's better to let them go on a good day, before they're in crisis and suffering when it's harder on them. She was right; it's harder on us this way, but kinder to them. I've tried to follow that guideline and still sometimes, have waited longer than I should. We do the best we can. Trust your instincts and your precious pup. I wish you comfort and peace.
 
I read somewhere that when wolves know it is time, they move away from the pack, knowing that their inabilities could threaten the safety of the other members. Cody did this. When he was outside, he would hide under my utility trailer. In the house, I would find him under the bed of our guest bedroom. I could see it in his eyes. It was time...
 
Ann said:
My Barkley had dementia. We let him go just a few months ago, at age 12. Barkley had Lyme disease as a puppy and relapses all his life, which aged him far too quickly. He had arthritis issues, caused by the Lyme, and about a year ago began having issues with dementia. He would get stuck in places in the house he knew, seem confused, refuse foods he'd preciously eaten. I struggled getting him to eat for the last 8 months. Finally, one afternoon he had a seizure and that was my sign that he had had enough. His poor body was a shell he was existing in, and not happily. Still, letting him go the next day was as hard as it always is.

I've had to make this decision with other Shelties so I am not a stranger to it, but you're never really sure it's time. I've second-guessed myself many times after the fact. The best advice I've ever gotten on this subject came from someone who has had Shelties all her life and is very wise. She said it's better to let them go on a good day, before they're in crisis and suffering when it's harder on them. She was right; it's harder on us this way, but kinder to them. I've tried to follow that guideline and still sometimes, have waited longer than I should. We do the best we can. Trust your instincts and your precious pup. I wish you comfort and peace.
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Thank you for sharing that. It was quite helpful, I have had to make the decision on all my pets. I have never had one that went on their own. There are two I have second guessed my decision. Missy, is the hardest one I have ever had. I just don't know. I said in a earlier post, Missy has been a difficult one her whole life ( we rescued at 2 1/2) with lots of issues and this part is so incredibly painful, this may be my last pet.
 
shelee said:
Very depressing question, esp at this time of year. I previously had a Sheltie with a liver shunt and it was obvious when life was no longer worth living. I currently have a almost 12 yr old Sheltie with advance elbow arthritis and panic attacks. My husband and I are just beginning to discuss this. I was wondering if anyone could share how they knew their Sheltie was no longer enjoying life and was ready? Thank you.
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❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
 
shelee said:
Thank you for sharing that. It was quite helpful, I have had to make the decision on all my pets. I have never had one that went on their own. There are two I have second guessed my decision. Missy, is the hardest one I have ever had. I just don't know. I said in a earlier post, Missy has been a difficult one her whole life ( we rescued at 2 1/2) with lots of issues and this part is so incredibly painful, this may be my last pet.
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I understand, but I hope it's not your last dog. ❤
 
shelee said:
Very depressing question, esp at this time of year. I previously had a Sheltie with a liver shunt and it was obvious when life was no longer worth living. I currently have a almost 12 yr old Sheltie with advance elbow arthritis and panic attacks. My husband and I are just beginning to discuss this. I was wondering if anyone could share how they knew their Sheltie was no longer enjoying life and was ready? Thank you.
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so sorry. This is a rough decision.

For me it was when he was no longer hanging on for me and still joyful. As long had the will to live, joy and seeking me, all his faculties and not getting snappy (and no major crisis that decided for me), we had the will to fight. When he developed episodes of sudden dementia and wasn’t eating, that was what made me do it. He was clearly in the process of dying. I had been on edge for a couple months deciding and asking vet just the week before. He battled liver cancer for a year and a half, slow growing but spread to lungs in last month, which would spread fast. It was the sudden confusion that was the last straw for me, he never actually gave up.
 
trini said:
I always ask myself if my little one could make a choice, would he/she want to go on because there is still enough comfort in living or has life become nothing but struggle and pain and there is literally no joy or comfort left...only the stoic attempt to get through each day no matter how awful.
Trini
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I think Trini hits the nail on the head here. We have all been there, they never make it easy for you. It is something I have to discuss with clients on a daily basis. I was planning to bring in my old Blue Heeler one Sunday to put him down , but two clients called and needed to be seen. I couldn't see them with tears running down my cheeks, so I held off. That afternoon Rocky collapsed and could no longer get up. There was a feeling of relief that the decision was now out of my hands. Sadly we rarely ge the smoking gun, we get the accumulation of disabilities until we have to make the decision.
But, yes, the key decision maker in my mind, as corny as it may sound, is "If you could ask them, what would they say."
We might get in some 17 yr old pointer, blind, skeletal, bald scabby old skin, arthritic- looks horrible, and just happy as hell. Wags his tail, goes over to meet everyone in the waiting room. And a crying owner says "The neighbors are calling the police saying I am being cruel." If you asked that dog if it was time, he would say "Get away from me man, what the heck are you talking about!"
Next patient might be a paraplegic with urine scald etc., and the owner says "I cant bring myself to let him go", and the dog just looks at you with those big brown sad eyes and says "Do something."
And, of course, as Trini also says , we have to consider the breed. Shelties are just SO loyal they worry more about us and why we are sad than about themselves. They have a kind of "Its ok Mom, I can do it" attitude that breaks your heart. And we have to intervene when we know it is in their best interest.
 
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