New sheltie and totally different then my old one

I can understand. Our first 2 came from rescue and they were completely different. Bailey had been surrendered as a puppy and his foster Mom did an amazing job socializing him before he came to us. He was even house broken which was an amazing gift. I can't imagine my life without Katy, but it was a much more challenging experience and I suspect it had much to do with her experience prior to coming into rescue. We don't have the details, but based on her lack of skills and her fear early on I suspect life was not good.

Our main weapon was Bailey. She fell in love with Bailey and he with her on the car ride home and they were inseparable until he died. He taught her how to climb the porch stairs. He protected her from strangers who wanted to touch the adorable Sheltie in the store. He loved attention and he'd shield her from people who were too aggressive and pushy before we even had a chance to intervene.

As for our relationship with her it took patience and lots of treats. She was terrified of us in the beginning and now she jumps up on the bed to snuggle with me in the morning at least a couple times a week. She will demand attention if she doesn't get enough. She will roll on her back for a tummy rub. None of that was possible in the first few months. It took time for her first to trust that this was a safe place and she was going to be OK.

Having a second more secure dog was huge in making her feel better. Our biggest challenge when Bailey died was her being an only dog. Thankfully with the help of a breeder we were able to find a 2 year old that she wanted to place as she wasn't suitable for obedience.

I can also relate to having driven the distance. The one rescue fail we had was because we too had driven a distance and wanted to find another dog before Bailey passed. I had reservations when we adopted Katy because Bailey who loved other dogs wouldn't go near her. I later found out as we were leaving that was because while that wasn't his foster Mom's home it was the clearing house for the rescue so he had been abandoned there and was likely terrified he was being left again. As I mentioned once he realized we were all going to the car together he immediately wanted to get to know Katy and started making her feel comfortable. Therefore, when I had doubts about our next rescue I dismissed them. I will NEVER make that mistake again. Katy was shy and reserved. The dog rescue fail was a dog we later discovered was supposed to be placed as an only dog because he had a history of aggression towards other dogs. Needless to say he went back to find a home more suitable to his needs.

There is no point in beating yourself up. I won't make that mistake again. I doubt you will either.

I will say having had 3 Shelties now while they are all recognizably Shelties, they have all been very different personalities. It is fair to have that heart dog. I think DH and I would admit we will never, ever have another dog like Bailey. He was truly an amazing, once in a life time companion. However, I can't imagine my life without having known Katy and now Annie. They are each unique and special in their own way. In some ways because I've had to work harder with Katy to gain her trust and love my relationship with her is very unique. Annie is a constant source of amusement. It is not the same, but is is special.
 
Shelby is completely different than our 1st Sheltie Hollie.

Shelby is not a big snuggler and she also does not like when anyone reaches for her head. We just accept the fact she just does not like to snuggle, so on the occasion that she does it makes us appreciate it even more. I think she gets hot when she does, and she HATES being warm.

I have no idea why she doesn't like anyone reaching for her head. Nothing has ever happened that we are aware of. If you reach for he head she will back away from you. So we just don't do that. I often just get on the floor and call her to me, then I reach for her sides and pet her sides and belly, and eventually her butt. And she loves it.

Shelby loves people, especially little children and babies. She also loves other dogs. So I think we did a pretty good job socializing her. I just think they all have their own personalities and likes and dislikes.

Just keep doing what you are, continue to socialize her and use lots of treats. I would bet that she will begin to come out of her shell and become a lot more secure.
 
Bailey's Mom said:
I can understand. Our first 2 came from rescue and they were completely different. Bailey had been surrendered as a puppy and his foster Mom did an amazing job socializing him before he came to us. He was even house broken which was an amazing gift. I can't imagine my life without Katy, but it was a much more challenging experience and I suspect it had much to do with her experience prior to coming into rescue. We don't have the details, but based on her lack of skills and her fear early on I suspect life was not good.

Our main weapon was Bailey. She fell in love with Bailey and he with her on the car ride home and they were inseparable until he died. He taught her how to climb the porch stairs. He protected her from strangers who wanted to touch the adorable Sheltie in the store. He loved attention and he'd shield her from people who were too aggressive and pushy before we even had a chance to intervene.

As for our relationship with her it took patience and lots of treats. She was terrified of us in the beginning and now she jumps up on the bed to snuggle with me in the morning at least a couple times a week. She will demand attention if she doesn't get enough. She will roll on her back for a tummy rub. None of that was possible in the first few months. It took time for her first to trust that this was a safe place and she was going to be OK.

Having a second more secure dog was huge in making her feel better. Our biggest challenge when Bailey died was her being an only dog. Thankfully with the help of a breeder we were able to find a 2 year old that she wanted to place as she wasn't suitable for obedience.

I can also relate to having driven the distance. The one rescue fail we had was because we too had driven a distance and wanted to find another dog before Bailey passed. I had reservations when we adopted Katy because Bailey who loved other dogs wouldn't go near her. I later found out as we were leaving that was because while that wasn't his foster Mom's home it was the clearing house for the rescue so he had been abandoned there and was likely terrified he was being left again. As I mentioned once he realized we were all going to the car together he immediately wanted to get to know Katy and started making her feel comfortable. Therefore, when I had doubts about our next rescue I dismissed them. I will NEVER make that mistake again. Katy was shy and reserved. The dog rescue fail was a dog we later discovered was supposed to be placed as an only dog because he had a history of aggression towards other dogs. Needless to say he went back to find a home more suitable to his needs.

There is no point in beating yourself up. I won't make that mistake again. I doubt you will either.

I will say having had 3 Shelties now while they are all recognizably Shelties, they have all been very different personalities. It is fair to have that heart dog. I think DH and I would admit we will never, ever have another dog like Bailey. He was truly an amazing, once in a life time companion. However, I can't imagine my life without having known Katy and now Annie. They are each unique and special in their own way. In some ways because I've had to work harder with Katy to gain her trust and love my relationship with her is very unique. Annie is a constant source of amusement. It is not the same, but is is special.
Click to expand...
Awe you made me cry haha ( I still and probably will never "get over loki") she is my heart dog but you are definially right they are there own little people and I'd give anything to have my baby back but I also couldn't give up my new baby Oakley. She is her own little person they talk and smile I have never met another breed like a sheltie and I'd never want another breed of dog. They are truly the perfect breed.
 
Now that you mention it our youngest is very shy about having the top of her head touched but the only dog I've had who enjoys having the hairy part of her snout rubbed. Annie also has never liked belly rubs the way the other 2 did, so unless we are cleaning or checking we don't intrude. She's made it clear where she prefers to be petted and massaged.

I didn't sense anything bad had happened to trigger these preferences she's just different.
 
I've always believed grief is a process, a journey. It isn't a matter of getting over or replacing, it is about the journey through grief to healing and the relationships you have during and after the healing. I had the chance to read some old blog posts I'd written about Bailey after Katy came along the other day and the memories came flooding back. I do miss having his presence in our lives. He was an amazing rock in our lives that likely will never come again. He had the capacity to do things and understand things the other two just don't have and I miss that.

However, I think I've reached a stage in my the healing process where I am finally grateful for the experience because I hadn't read gone back to read those old posts prior to this because I didn't want to stir up painful reminders that he is gone and there won't be anymore Bailey stories. I laughed, I smiled, and I even shared some stories with DH that I'd forgotten when he came home from work that I'd forgotten. That was one of the reasons I started the blog. There are so many amazing stories and it is hard to recall them all. Returning to them now that I'm ready has been an amazing gift.
 
Bailey's Mom said:
Now that you mention it our youngest is very shy about having the top of her head touched but the only dog I've had who enjoys having the hairy part of her snout rubbed. Annie also has never liked belly rubs the way the other 2 did, so unless we are cleaning or checking we don't intrude. She's made it clear where she prefers to be petted and massaged.

I didn't sense anything bad had happened to trigger these preferences she's just different.
Click to expand...
Belly rubs required you flip over which was WAY to undignified for Sca LOL He would let you pet him if he was on his side but not even raise a paw. He was always very proper.
 
My Shadow slept on his back with his tummy up and legs splayed apart--he obviously felt safe and secure, and loved loved loved belly rubs. Beau won't sleep soundly unless he is in his crate, so obviously he is a more defensive dog in some ways. Shadow was like Ferdinand, he would go outside and watch the bunnies and birds happily in the sun, then run like crazy after a ball. Beau tires of balls (except huge ones) after a few turns but won't let the bunnies, birds, bees, squirrels or anything, live and moving, alone. But it is funny, Shadow was timid and a bit afraid around other dogs--Beau adores them all. Shadow was my shadow, he followed me literally everywhere. Beau is a little more independent and dependent at the same time--he is happy to be in another room, but when we go out he looks to me for everything. So yes, they are different. Shadow was my heart dog among all the dogs I have had. But Beau may just be my soul dog. It takes time to settle into the newness of personality when you are comfortable with the accustomed feel and time spent with a favorite buddy. But every challenge brings learning and new appreciation along with it. I think you will find your new puppy will teach you so much you would not have learned without her. I know my Beau has taken me places and made me learn things I never would have.
 
Last edited:
Pam said:
. I think you will find your new puppy will teach you so much you would not have learned without her. I know my Beau has taken me places and made me learn things I never would have.
Click to expand...

That stated it so well. I might not have chosen some of the personality quirks of the second 2 but they each have added something special and unique to our family. I am very glad they are in our lives.
 
Savana Reed said:
No she is my moms and I take mine foe play days with her.
Click to expand...
Just checking if it could be litter mate syndrome.

My current female Sheltie was extremely shy as a youngster and rather aloof as a puppy. At one point I had even considered returning her to the breeder (and it still makes me shudder to think I considered it). She was so different to my other Shelties - all male and all pretty confident 'mummy's boys'. However, she did grow out of it - she's not completely confident (esp around other dogs) but is confident enough. I did put a lot of extra work into her, more so than my current male who was a breeze as a pup and a cheeky bugger when he got older. Nowadays she has the loveliest manners - thanks to all that extra work, but also she is very affectionate and works as a therapy dog. It was just a matter of us working out our common language. Tully is a high drive Sheltie - so if it's a choice between the ball and a cuddle she'll take the ball first. But when she's not chasing things she's cuddling up with me. And actually I prefer her personality to my males - she gives me space when I need it, is not so demanding but still loves and cuddles me when I need it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top