OntarioSheltie
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Dawn, I emailed this to you also, sorry if you're getting it twice. I just wanted to make sure that you see it.
You have been a wonderful friend to me these last few months while I've been dealing with Sadie. I don't know what I would have done without your support, knowing that you've been through something similar and I'm so sorry if I led you to believe I was telling you to give up on Chandler. I would never tell you to do that, especially after all that we've been through with our pups.
Changing focus and trying a different approach isn't giving up. In this case, giving up is throwing your hands in the air and deciding to euthanize or giving him to someone else to deal with. Both things I'd never suggest.
A few years ago we were dealing with a cat that I loved who also appeared to have lung cancer. What we knew was that she'd have episodes of severe diarrhea and vomiting that were so bad, she wouldn't respond to anything and if given the chance she'd try to leave to hide where ever she could (to die, presumably.). These episodes would last for days. We decided that testing or treating the cancer was not in her best interest and instead concentrated on making her comfortable. Since there was nothing we could do about these episodes and they made her so uncomfortable, we decided if he had another one we'd put her out of her misery.
We started feeding her food that she liked to help her put on weight, instead of food that was good for her and allowed her to go outside as much as she liked, she loved sleeping in the bushes around our house. The episodes completely stopped on their own.
She had a great life for another two years and when we did finally put her down it was because she had severe arthritis, something else we'd also began treating.
I only meant with Chandler that you should accept that there's a good chance he has cancer. Accepting that its there and there's nothing you can do about it may lessen not only your stress, but also Chandlers, since he won't sense how upset and stressed you are, especially since you've had issues with Gypsy also. This is exactly what I did with Sadie, in order to help her with her rehab.
If taking him for walks on leash stress him out, then don't take him. Instead concentrate on the games that make him happy, like playing ball or running around with him off leash. This will just lessen his stress but its in no way giving up on him.
Keep up with any treatments that seem to help him but don't feel guilty for not doing more, like paying for the MRI. You and I both know what a waste of money it is and it wouldn't help him anyway.
Using baby gates to confine him to a certain area and doing things like using a stuffed kong, a treat cube, plug in pheramones and doing things like jingling keys, putting on your coat or shoes and then not leaving should help lessen his anxiety. If all else fails you could consider giving him anxiety medication before you leave, if your vet will allow it.
These are all ideas that could make him more comfortable but are in no way giving up on him.
Again, I'm so sorry if I gave you the impression that I thought you should give up on him, I never meant to. I just know how it feels to feel devastated, helpless and like no matter how much you try its just never enough. Do yourself a favor and stop driving yourself crazy. Concentrate on now, the good days you have with him and all of the things that you're doing that are making his life better.
If you ever feel the need to talk you can email me or PM me any time.
You have been a wonderful friend to me these last few months while I've been dealing with Sadie. I don't know what I would have done without your support, knowing that you've been through something similar and I'm so sorry if I led you to believe I was telling you to give up on Chandler. I would never tell you to do that, especially after all that we've been through with our pups.
Changing focus and trying a different approach isn't giving up. In this case, giving up is throwing your hands in the air and deciding to euthanize or giving him to someone else to deal with. Both things I'd never suggest.
A few years ago we were dealing with a cat that I loved who also appeared to have lung cancer. What we knew was that she'd have episodes of severe diarrhea and vomiting that were so bad, she wouldn't respond to anything and if given the chance she'd try to leave to hide where ever she could (to die, presumably.). These episodes would last for days. We decided that testing or treating the cancer was not in her best interest and instead concentrated on making her comfortable. Since there was nothing we could do about these episodes and they made her so uncomfortable, we decided if he had another one we'd put her out of her misery.
We started feeding her food that she liked to help her put on weight, instead of food that was good for her and allowed her to go outside as much as she liked, she loved sleeping in the bushes around our house. The episodes completely stopped on their own.
She had a great life for another two years and when we did finally put her down it was because she had severe arthritis, something else we'd also began treating.
I only meant with Chandler that you should accept that there's a good chance he has cancer. Accepting that its there and there's nothing you can do about it may lessen not only your stress, but also Chandlers, since he won't sense how upset and stressed you are, especially since you've had issues with Gypsy also. This is exactly what I did with Sadie, in order to help her with her rehab.
If taking him for walks on leash stress him out, then don't take him. Instead concentrate on the games that make him happy, like playing ball or running around with him off leash. This will just lessen his stress but its in no way giving up on him.
Keep up with any treatments that seem to help him but don't feel guilty for not doing more, like paying for the MRI. You and I both know what a waste of money it is and it wouldn't help him anyway.
Using baby gates to confine him to a certain area and doing things like using a stuffed kong, a treat cube, plug in pheramones and doing things like jingling keys, putting on your coat or shoes and then not leaving should help lessen his anxiety. If all else fails you could consider giving him anxiety medication before you leave, if your vet will allow it.
These are all ideas that could make him more comfortable but are in no way giving up on him.
Again, I'm so sorry if I gave you the impression that I thought you should give up on him, I never meant to. I just know how it feels to feel devastated, helpless and like no matter how much you try its just never enough. Do yourself a favor and stop driving yourself crazy. Concentrate on now, the good days you have with him and all of the things that you're doing that are making his life better.
If you ever feel the need to talk you can email me or PM me any time.
