Skittish and afraid when around me

Beau knows instinctively who he can approach and not approach. He was like this from the first time I met him. When I first saw Beau in the shelter. Everyone was forcing themselves on him. He crouched in the corner of his cage. I stood to the side of his cage and I did not try to get his attention. After a few minutes, he walked up, I took him out for a walk and when it was time to go back to his cage he looked up at me and put his paw in my hand. The rest as they say is History.

I would suggest maybe sitting on the floor and just letting her come up to you on her own terms and go from there.
 
There's an old nursery rhyme that goes like this:

I do not like thee, Doctor Fell,
The reason why, I may not tell,
But this I know, and know full well:
I do not like thee, Doctor Fell.
 
I'm sorry, but if one of my dogs acted like that, you would be out of my house. Period.

The dog can pick up how you feel about her. If this doesn't change, she won't change. I trust my dog and their reactions many times over my own.
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From what I have read, it sounds like you do not like the dog and since Shelties are so sensitive, they will pick up on that immediately. If I can pick up an "I don't like you attitude" I am sure the dog can as well, better work on this.
 
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In a choice between you and the dog in my house, there would be no contest.

Just about sums up the whole shebang and how I feel about 99.8% of people.

I got a good laugh out of that response though and given the last few days I needed it, thanks
 
Shelties are slow to trust new people, and also very smart. The dog knows you don't like her. The dog will never like you with the way you really feel about it. Find a new girlfriend with a dog you like.

I dated a man once who had a GSD that didn't like me, and I didn't like her. She used to stare me down when he was out of the room, I'm sure she was thinking 'I've got your number lady.'. I knew in my heart it wouldn't work out between the three of us, and he wasn't getting rid of his beloved dog- I wouldn't want someone who would do that. I moved on, hopefully he found a lady his dog liked. That's my suggestion to you, move on.

And don't go to a breed specific website & bash the breed/type of dog, it doesn't help your case or garner any sympathy. Just makes you seem like a a jerk.
 
jomuir said:
Shelties are slow to trust new people, and also very smart. The dog knows you don't like her. The dog will never like you with the way you really feel about it. Find a new girlfriend with a dog you like.

I dated a man once who had a GSD that didn't like me, and I didn't like her. She used to stare me down when he was out of the room, I'm sure she was thinking 'I've got your number lady.'. I knew in my heart it wouldn't work out between the three of us, and he wasn't getting rid of his beloved dog- I wouldn't want someone who would do that. I moved on, hopefully he found a lady his dog liked. That's my suggestion to you, move on.

And don't go to a breed specific website & bash the breed/type of dog, it doesn't help your case or garner any sympathy. Just makes you seem like a a jerk.
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I agree that breaking up would be the best thing for all involved. It will definitely be hard, but it's going to be harder in the long run if you hate her dog, the dog doesn't like you, and she loves her dog.

I dated a man for years who really didn't care for Shelties. The Sheltie I had then was always aloof around him, although still polite. He didn't hate her, but he didn't love her either. About a year after she passed away I told him I was looking at getting a Sheltie and he said basically I could choose between him and a Sheltie.

I chose the Sheltie. :biggrin2:

And really, there were more issues beyond the Sheltie, but that triggered it. And I think it is better for everyone involved. I'll always have a Sheltie in my life, and I need to find someone who doesn't just tolerate them, but loves them so everyone is happy. My ex will be happier finding someone who wants the same kind of dog he loves. Dogs are (or should be!) an important part of your life if you have one, and in my opinion the couple should be on the same page when it comes to the dog.

Breakups are painful (I speak from recent experience) but it will be better in the long run for both of you.
 
I knew that nobody here would like my post and I have told my girlfriend these exact things word for word the whole time we have been together. She knows I would never harm the dog. I should have added the barking is not at me but is at anything and everything as she lives in an apartment surrounded by sounds. The GF will not discipline the dog for the barking or try to correct the problem with training and has almost been evicted due to numerous complaints by other tenants. Now that I am in the picture and have tried to discipline/train the dog I am seen as the enemy by the dog because it has never been given any guidance by her owner.
I have tried numerous times to pet the dog(only on the head as I stated I hate the long greasy hair feel) and make friends but the dog won't have it and the GF does not do anything to reassure the dog that everything is OK she just allows the dog to run and act like a crazy spazzed out weirdo.

Guess the answer I am looking for is what kind of training can be done to help curb the barking and make the dog feel comfortable around anyone. The GF thinks that by telling her dog NO to anything is gonna make the dog hate her so pretty much the dog is the leader of the house and does anything it wants including going to the bathroom in the house with no sort of discipline for that either. Basically I am saying the GF is the enabler for the dogs behavior issues.
 
MissieLynn said:
I agree that breaking up would be the best thing for all involved. It will definitely be hard, but it's going to be harder in the long run if you hate her dog, the dog doesn't like you, and she loves her dog.

I dated a man for years who really didn't care for Shelties. The Sheltie I had then was always aloof around him, although still polite. He didn't hate her, but he didn't love her either. About a year after she passed away I told him I was looking at getting a Sheltie and he said basically I could choose between him and a Sheltie.

I chose the Sheltie. :biggrin2:

And really, there were more issues beyond the Sheltie, but that triggered it. And I think it is better for everyone involved. I'll always have a Sheltie in my life, and I need to find someone who doesn't just tolerate them, but loves them so everyone is happy. My ex will be happier finding someone who wants the same kind of dog he loves. Dogs are (or should be!) an important part of your life if you have one, and in my opinion the couple should be on the same page when it comes to the dog.

Breakups are painful (I speak from recent experience) but it will be better in the long run for both of you.
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I have let it be known that if we do stay together for many more years once this Sheltie is gone it will be that same choice if she decides she want's another. Me or the dog
 
I have tried to respond to this several times but it's hard not to get belligerent. The dog dislikes and distrusts you for all the reasons that you have laid out in your telling us why you don't like it.
Dogs, on a whole, can tell when you are playing a part or "putting up" with them. You yell at this sensitive breed, you don't like it barking and you think your girlfriend is useless as an owner so you project that in the dog's presence. You don't like to touch it, etc. etc.
Is there anything you do like about it??? When I started dating my husband I told him that if my children didn't like him we could still date but he wouldn't be allowed at our home. He didn't want kids in his first marriage so it was a concern. I would feel the same about my dog since I decided to take the responsibility for the health and well being of it long before the new man.
Hubby loved me enough to give the kids a chance, learn what their needs were and be a strong and loyal figure in their lives. Thirty-two years later, they adore him and he them. If this girl means much to you at all, then learn to teach the dog as if you had picked it out in the first place. Take it to obedience school, learn how to groom it, figure out it's favourite toy and play with it. If it really feels greasy after a fresh bath then suggest you see a vet to find out why because no sheltie should feel that way. If there is nothing to be done on that score you can just wash your hands after handling the dog. If you can't go that far for someone that you care about, what the heck are you doing with her?
 
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